I am a very lucky girl. I have this place, Torrey Pines, in my backyard. Okay, it’s not technically my backyard but a quick jaunt down the highway.
I try to enjoy time here at least once a week. It lifts my spirits, opens creativity, and always inspires. Oh, and for you San Diegans – it’s great for meetings that don’t require white boards or computers…of which, there are more than you think.
Walking here last weekend, I stopped at one point to take in the splendor. While I’ve done the same hike here perhaps 100 times before, I was captured by the intricate perfection of the moment: mighty pelicans patrolling the coastline, glistening ocean waves misting a crisp saltiness into the air, buzzing bees and butterflies between blooms, sunny summer skies above and sand between my toes below.
In that moment, I understood that everything works when it’s allowed. All that beauty outside was created in just the same way as the me inside; and for someone who spent SO much of her life trying to control my appearance out of absolute FEAR, this was a heart-felt message, indeed.
We are created in the intention that our bodies are healthy, vibrant and beautiful. They ebb and flow in through seasons of fullness and more barren times, richness and plateau, newness and decay. They can be TRUSTED. Really, what would happen if the ocean told herself to, “Suck it in!”??
To think that for half my life, I thought that I could control my body better than it knew how to do itself seems so incredibly silly now. But at the time, it seemed to be the only way.
Today, I have faith that my body can take care of itself when I listen to what it needs instead of soliciting magazines, nutrition labels, and models to tell me what it should have.
In the stillness of listening, and gratitude, I find forgiveness for following the path as best I knew how because the lessons I’ve learned are now etched in me – layers of wisdom petrified as my own sturdy trunk.
“You may be deceived if you trust too much, but you will live in torment if you don’t trust enough.” -Frank Crane
I choose love.