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October Update!

Since October of last year, I have lived in two different towns in Southern Baja and two here in the US with my husband, now two-year-old-daughter, trusty Labrador and baby-on-the-way (yes, baby boy Russell is coming this holiday season!).  We have also traversed the nation – from the tip of Baja to Vancouver Island, throughout…

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Space for Grace on my 39th Birthday

My daughter crawls into my arms, big brown eyes gazing down into mine that are adjusting to the daylight shining through the crack in our bedroom window shades. “Good morning, mommy,” she chirps in her soft, sweet almost two-year-old voice.  I break a smile and we banter a bit. She continues, “Happy birthday, mommy.” My…

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Blessed is this Life: Thoughts on the Eve of 39

Tomorrow I turn 39, and I approach this birthday with a full heart. Life looks different than it once did. Mostly, I have finally come home to myself. Being in my skin is comfortable, relaxing even. And all that I do – the many roles I fill as wife, mother, coach, friend, and more –…

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Hands in the Dirt

My breath tastes of compost and dust as I scoop a handful of damp earth with my right hand and gently place the roots of an arugula start into its new home with my left. I pat soil back around the hopeful green sprout and wish it ease and endurance as it settles in. I…

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On Hiroshima & Choosing Peace

Today, August 6th, 2018, is the 73rd anniversary of the atomic bombing of Hiroshima by the United States. The white concrete ceiling supported by horizontally-running exposed redwood beams soars at least two stories above the heads of about 150 seated attendees at Sunday’s gathering at the Green Gulch Zen Center in Mill Valley. Something about…

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I Choose Sobriety | 1 Year

“Mama! Ma—-maaaaa!!” Lily exclaims as she crawls over to me in the dark, steadying her small, soft hands on my cheeks and nose. Before I try to open my eyes, the thought, “It’s too early for this,” runs through my mind. I take a deep breath and look over at my daughter’s bright eyes that…

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Headwinds

A gray mist envelops us in a damp hug that leaves its cold sweat on exposed skin.  The condensation is warmer than the biting winds that sweep through the canyon with seeming mockery as they push directly at us from ahead. We are three-quarters of the way into our three-week private rafting trip through the Grand…

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WOW: When the Process is Enough

“Activation and cultivation of the imagination is a practice.  Wildness is its breeding ground — wildness of place, wildness of heart and mind.” – Albert Flynn De Silver, Writing as a Path to Awakening “Why am I writing?  I mean, what’s the point?” I say to my coach as serpent fingers of yearning try to…

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When Things Fall Apart

Day 1. On the first leg of my travel from Cabo to Nashville, I write this blog on the ways leaving my daughter for the first time since her birth is touching my heart. After boarding the second leg in Houston, we deplane before takeoff due to a mechanical issue. The gate attendant says there…

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She’s Not a Baby Anymore

“I would like to bring Lily to the airport when you drop me off.  That way, if she’s wondering where I am, she can remember that I went on an airplane (she knows them well by now after all of our travel together),” I told Dave a couple of days ago. But in this morning’s…

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