Although I was extremely reluctant to give it up, I’ll be on the road without a computer for the next week and a half.  I’m off on a missions trip, so I’ll have much to share upon my return.  I’ll miss you!

Enjoy this little video.  Here’s to seeing the world with magic glasses.

The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others. – Ghandi

As far as service goes, it can take the form of a million things. To do service, you don’t have to be a doctor working in the slums for free, or become a social worker. Your position in life and what you do doesn’t matter as much as how you do what you do. – Elizabeth Kubler Ross

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D38S9o_6qnc

♥ 90 Days of Love: 42/90 loving choices. ♥
Little choices + time =  wholehearted change.

Photo Credit: http://pinterest.com/pin/228065168599335723/

In the past three days, I have seen two pictures circulating on Pintrest and Facebook from “pro-ana” sites.

Unsuspecting dieters are liking and sharing these images (one at 50 likes/hr!) that display clear indicators of starving intentions: references to “pro-ana” tubmlr sites in their bottom right corners.*

If you are not familiar with them, “pro-ana” sites promote anorexic images, weight loss tactics, and normalization of the condition for the the thin-obsessed anorexics who create and frequent them.

The two circulating images I’ve recently seen (of many more) are of “perfectly” skinny women in bikinis – one with details about a tonic that will help you lose 5 lbs in 7 days; the other above.

These images feed lies.  You cannot lose 5 lbs in 7 days healthily (it’s just water weight that you’ll gain back), and 15 scissor kicks will not give you a size 24 waist.

The deeper lie is that that one must have a size 24 waist in order to be beautiful and therefore valuable, worthy, and lovable.  Quick fixes don’t last, and true beauty is not cheap!

Let me be clear.  I am not knocking beauty or our collective desire for it and appreciation of it.  Beauty inspires us, and it is a true and healthy desire.  However, when beauty becomes our idol or obsession, we have placed it somewhere where it was not meant to be.  Beauty is a natural expression of love that has been exploited by advertising dollars and an unhealthy desire to control.

When we are obsessed with our waistlines or plagued with the shame of not being able to reach what is not healthy or sustainable for most, we are not others-focused.  We are not in service.

In fact, we have literally turned the spotlight on ourselves so obsessively that we are nit-picking our tiniest “imperfections.”  We were not created to hyper-focus on ourselves.  We were created to give and serve with the unique gifts blessed to each and every one of us.

If you are comparing yourself to others, you are not expressing or intending true beauty.  If your drive comes from shame, fear, or judgement, the sense of beauty you attain will be fleeting.  Let beauty be a natural expression of the love and joy within.

I choose not to celebrate anorexia as beautiful.  I choose to live a healthy lifestyle – period – and not ride the diet roller coaster that only ever asks for the next best fad.

Please take a moment to watch this video, which has also been circulating recently.  On the opposite end of the spectrum, Jonathan and Charlotte create an experience of true beauty as an artful expression of voice, inspiration, and loyalty.

Thought for the day:  I am beautiful, and I choose to see the beauty in all those I meet.  I ask to be given opportunities appreciate the gifting of others and to share my unique gifts in service of the greater good.  Because I choose to honor my body as a beautiful vessel through which to serve, I keep it healthy with rest, nutritious food, and exercise.  I choose love.

♥

“Beautiful people do not just happen.” -Elizabeth Kubler Ros

♥ 90 Days of Love: 38/90 loving choices. ♥
Little choices + time =  wholehearted change.

___

* The site I saw last Friday referenced a URL as bold as “ana4life” and you can see the one attached points to “boneobsession.tumblr.com,” which has been taken down.  I am guessing the removal of the site is because of its promotion of thin-spiration which has been banned by tumblr.

Our words have power.  We create through our language.  Our thoughts create our words which in turn create our actions, character, and lives.  I have heard many different variations of the idea that our words have power, and never before have I understood this concept more than I do now.

I teach yoga, and I’ve started offering little affirmations like, “I am strong,” or “I am peaceful,” when I see a student, say, having a hard time in a balancing posture.  Almost immediately, the student’s energy will shift.  Amazing.

Conversely, I was recently traveling and decided to watch television for a whole evening.  I don’t have TV at home and am pretty selective about the media I consume.  One hour of watching the news left me about as uncomfortable as I would have been having eaten a Big Mac and fries for dinner.  Every other sentence included one of the following words: terror, fear, murder, arson, war, anger, fight, victim, gunned down, kidnapping, or trial.  I’m sorry, yes, those things all happen, but that is not the reality I choose.

Let us be conscious and careful with our words – those we say to ourselves and each other, as well as those we consume.  Our words have great power.  They can lift people up, ignite sparks of truth, or break people down.  People become what we call them.  Choose love and be a stand for greatness in yourself and all those you touch.

Check out this work by Dr. Masaru Emoto, who showed molecular changes in water exposed to different words.  Consider just how powerful your thoughts and words are, and please, choose them lovingly.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tAvzsjcBtx8

Remember, attitude is everything!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pTgOLLmTQI0

♥ 90 Days of Love: 30/90 loving choices. ♥
Little choices + time =  wholehearted change.

Photo Credit: Dr. Masaru Emoto’s water crystal study, “Hope”

Do you daydream about the grass being greener?  At times, I do.  One trigger is the common question, “Why aren’t you married?”  So glad you asked.

Let’s cut to the chase.  Would I like to be married now?  Sure, my perfectly designed plan included meeting prince charming years ago and our happily-ever-after with two brilliant kids by now.  Fortunately, life doesn’t always adhere to my plans.

At 32, life is in ways better than I could have ever imagined, and yet that “I wish I had someone to talk to about this/cuddle/do life with right now” conversation does seep in from time to time.

So yes, I would like to be passionately partnered, and since I’m not, I thought to take a moment to appreciate just how awesome single life is.  Because it is.  While an old couple holding hands or a smiling baby can stir thoughts of greener grass, I am happy and very grateful to be exactly where I am.

Why do I celebrate single life?

1. I know who I am (at least somewhat):  I’ve taken the time to learn about who I am and consider who I was created to be rather than just being who everyone wants me to be.  I have learned what makes me tick, what kind of people I truly enjoy being around, and what kind of work lights me up inside.  I’ve experienced heartache, healing, and great joy, and this experience of the fullness of life has given me a great deal of compassion.

2.  Deep friendships with great girlfriends: Especially over the past few years, I have enjoyed the blessing of deep and true friendship.  Cultivating relationship with my girlfriends has been among my highest priorities, and I’ve been very grateful for a time to forge solid and authentic friendships with such inspiring women.  Highlights of my weeks include meeting friends for early morning walks, gym dates, and dinners.  What a blessing to do so with such amazing ladies!

3.  Ironing out the kinks: I appreciate the learning moments and incredible growth that I’ve endured so that I will be able to be the partner I want to be rather than the self-centered person I was.  (I never thought of myself as self-centered; in fact, I thought I was generous.  But truth be told, ego was running the show uncontested.)  I know it must shock you, but I had a few kinks to iron out, and I’m glad to have had the opportunity to do so.

4.  Don’t settle: Could I be married?  Probably – if I was willing to settle.  The 80% – hey, 90% even – right has come along, but I’ve listened to that little voice telling me not to settle.  I believe it’s guiding me to the perfectly-designed partner for me…wherever he is, whenever he might come.  Learning to not settle in business and life has been a valuable lesson.  It’s been risky and has required courage at times, but it’s proved to always be worth it in the end.

5.   Doing what I want when I want…for the most part: I appreciate being able to honor my life’s natural flow for a while.  I will enjoy it while I can!  Do I want to go to yoga?  I can!  Walk Torrey?  That too!  Work until midnight?  Yup.  I naturally tend to put other people’s needs before mine, so the time alone allows me to find the beat of my own drum and march to it!  Being able to follow my heart has helped me ground into my values in a way that I hadn’t before – to create a life by design rather than default.

So, as Alison Armstrong of PAX mentions, I will keep “sorting” until I find that one my heart has been looking for.  (She teaches that we should, “Sort and sort fast!”)  In the meantime, I will continue to enjoy how great single life really is.

Remember, the grass is never greener on the other side.  It may just look that way.  Appreciate where you are when you’re there because chances are, it will be your only shot to live that season of life to the fullest.  I know I am.

Do you love being exactly where you are right now?  Share your experience below!

♥ 90 Days of Love: 29/90 loving choices. ♥
Little choices + time =  wholehearted change.

Photo Credit: http://pinterest.com/pin/134545107587832492/

By Author Unknown

The 92-year-old, petite, well-poised and proud lady, who is fully dressed each morning by eight o’clock, with her hair fashionably coifed and makeup perfectly applied, even though she is legally blind, moved to a nursing home today.  Her husband of 70 years recently passed away, making the move necessary.

After many hours of waiting patiently in the lobby of the nursing home, she smiled sweetly when told her room was ready.  As she maneuvered her walker to the elevator, I provided a visual description of her tiny room, including the eyelet sheets that had been hung on her window.

“I love it,” she stated with the enthusiasm of an eight-year-old having just been presented with a new puppy.

“Mrs. Jones, you haven’t seen the room …. just wait.”

“That doesn’t have anything to do with it,” she replied.

“Happiness is something you decide on ahead of time. Whether I like my room or not doesn’t depend on how the furniture is arranged, it’s how I arrange my mind. I already decided to love it. It’s a decision I make every morning when I wake up.

I have a choice; I can spend the day in bed recounting the difficulty I have with the parts of my body that no longer work, or get out of bed and be thankful for the ones that do. Each day is a gift, and as long as my eyes open I’ll focus on the new day and all the happy memories I’ve stored away, just for this time in my life.”

She went on to explain, “Old age is like a bank account, you withdraw from what you’ve put in. So, my advice to you would be to deposit a lot of happiness in the bank account of memories Thank you for your part in filling my Memory bank.  I am still depositing.”

And with a smile, she said:

“Remember the five simple rules to be happy:

1. Free your heart from hatred.
2. Free your mind from worries.
3. Live simply.
4. Give more.
5. Expect less.”

Source: A fabulous custom day planner given as a party favor at a friend’s bachelorette party.

Photo credit: http://pinterest.com/pin/222083825344192031/

It’s very simple, right?  When you fall, brush yourself off and get back up!

We’re 3 weeks into the Love Challenge (woohoo!), and it’s time for some healthy correction.  Have you ever felt like you have micromanaged your life or part of it – like your diet, cleanliness, schedule, partner or otherwise?

As I reflect over the past 3 weeks, I realize that I have!  In effort to “choose love,” I have been controlling how much sleep I got, my meals, my exercise, and who I saw when.  I was happy and felt amazing, but the mark of the white-knuckling perfectionist could be found all throughout.

These controlling tendencies became apparent when after a couple nights of skimping on sleep, moving through stressful class – statistics, yuck!, and not exercising, I took a fall.  That cloud of peace and comfort that I had been floating on – poof – disappeared.  I became anxious and agitated.  NOT SO LOVING!

I see now that my seemingly loving choices were actually coming from fear.  I was afraid of getting run down, so choosing love was being kinder and gentler to myself.  But, the loving experience was temporary.  Because I was creating a loving structure out of fear, the moment that that structure was not in place, I fell – plop! – into the current of fear below.   I could never truly relax because I was contantly having to make sure my structure was sturdy enough.

While I was making loving choices for myself, I was doing so from FEAR not FAITH.

Thankfully, seeing the situation for what it was, I chose to make some prayer time, refocused in gratitude, and I am back on my feet again.

Look at it this way:  In trying to control my environment, I tripped and fell.  In going to God, I got up.  With gratitude, I brushed myself off.  And with a new understanding of what it means to choose love, I keep going.

In choosing to BELIEVE THAT OUR TRUTH IS LOVE and not anxiety or depression or lack or needing to prove ourselves, we can start to create from a loving place that lasts.  I can create not fearing the next fall but celebrating the journey because I am doing so trusting that love will prevail.  Choosing love must not, then, be reliant on circumstance at all but exist as a choice again and again in every minute to see the world, myself, and others as the truth that we all big hearts trying to do our best in this crazy game called life.

 ♥ 90 Days of Love: 22/90 loving choices. ♥
Little choices + time =  wholehearted change.

Photo Credit: http://pinterest.com/pin/134545107587802884/ 

Are you willing to be the deviant?

I was happy to make Carl Nordgren’s lecture at my school yesterday.  The visiting professor of creative entrepreneurship at Duke University and self-proclaimed “Creative Populist” caught my attention.

Nordren encouraged “kaleidoscopic thinking” – being willing to look at problems from every angle and explore relationships between pieces from different points of view.  He said that being the deviant is a marker of the creative populist.  These creatives look at culture differently and aren’t focused on the status quo.

Want to cultivate your “creative populist”?

Employ these 4 Creatively Entrepreneurial Behaviors:

1.  Be generous:  We are to be generous with our ideas and support one another in our creativity.  He said that so often the earliest forms of the best ideas are the most fragile.  Be willing to help others nurture and grow their ideas.

2.  Be humble:  Worry less about being right and more about allowing truth to emerge.  (Love this one.)

3.  Be playful:  Play engages the imagination.  For kids, it gives them a places to imagine, explore, and engage with one another.  Open ended play is fertile ground for a budding creative entrepreneur.

4.  Enthusiastically pursue beauty:  Experiencing beauty is the most refreshing experience in the world to most people most of the time.

I agree!  Nordgren’s work reminded me of The Wayseer Manifesto.:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OPR3GlpQQJA

On his website, Nordgren writes: “I have concluded that the Creatively Entrepreneurial talent pool of this generation is so much deeper and broader than previous generations that it marks them out as different, not in kind but in degree, and that they have the potential to become the First Great Creative Generation.”

Here’s to the deviants – the creatives that elevate us all.

♥ 90 Days of Love: 19/90 loving choices. ♥
Little choices + time =  wholehearted change.

Photo credit: http://pinterest.com/pin/54676582945532223/

The origin of the word encourage is “en-” “courage,” which means: “to cause (a person) to be in” [his] “heart.”

Encouragement speaks through the outer and goes straight to the heart.  It is seeing that spark of truth within another that he does not – that perhaps has never been recognized or acknowledged.  When we choose to look beyond our limited construct of expectation, we can see seeds of who a person is yearning to become.  Our words – our encouragement – become water to those gardens of purpose, passion, and truth.

Believing in people is a great gift.  Who are the people who believed in you?  In reflection, I can see that I excelled in the areas where I was encouraged – often becoming what was spoken over me.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y_MCwlY6zzg

When we speak into truth, into the heart, ego mind-stuff melts away.  Like in this film, one person truly seeing the light in another can spark transformation.  The showman stoops down to see Will on his level and says, “You are magnificent.”  In that moment, Will is seen as God made him, and from that moment on, Will can begin his pursuit of that truth.  Yes, he is tested – again and again – but with the spark of magnificence alive within, he has enough courage to take the next step until he meets his moment of glory – which, by the way, was not the high dive but the ability to inspire another little boy to experience the possibility of magnificence within him.

You, too, are magnificent.  Your biggest challenge can been your greatest source of inspiration one day.  I know this to be true because I am living it.  That part of you that you believe is most unlovable is the one that just might inspire the most love.  Be the spark…and pass it on.

♥ 90 Days of Love: 17/90 loving choices. ♥
Little choices + time =  wholehearted change.

Today is 15 – 2 weeks and a day – into my 90 day “love challenge.”  Here are 6 lessons I’ve learned so far:

1.  Sleep does the body good.  8 hours of power is the base ingredient of living from love.

2.  Speak your truth.  Where are you still hiding?  Here’s a little distinction I’ve noticed: Speaking your truth means showing your whole hand – not just being truthful about 4 of 5 cards.  Bring the whole truth to the table and play a different game.

3.  People want to help; let them.  I have been struck by how people have been offering support recently.  Our job is to let them!  Be willing to be vulnerable and show people that you don’t always know what you’re doing.  (Refer to #2.)  Only then is there room for solutions to appear.

4.  Vulnerability inspires.  A vulnerable heart is a gift.  When we get over ourselves and the need to look good, we can connect in the ways that really matter because we are real.  The whole “I’ve got it all together and am therefore better than you” thing is so turn-of-the-century.

5.  All good things come to an end some time.  Let them.  People come into our lives – some for a reason, some for a season, and some for a lifetime.  Accept people for who they are and who they aren’t.  Building upon 2, 3, and 4: When the cards are all on the table, we can align with people in relationships that are more fulfilling, powerful, and real.

6.  God is good.  Taking my own advice from #2, these past two weeks have been a blessing, and I give Him all the glory.  No religion; just relationship…and a whole lotta Love.

Shining bright this Sunday night;

S

 ♥ 90 Days of Love: 15/90 loving choices. ♥
Little choices + time =  wholehearted change.

Photo credit: http://pinterest.com/pin/134545107587768774/

What would you do with 15 seconds that were a matter of life and death?

Tonight, I went to a screening of Promised Land, a surfing-inspired documentary that elegantly weaves Israel’s rich history with a story of shared passion that transcends the country’s cultural and religious strife.

The Mayor of Sderot, Israel, David Buskila, happened to be in town, and he introduced the film.  Sderot is currently under attack; 120 missiles have been fired at the city in the last 24 hours.  To a captivated audience, Buskila shared what it has been like to live under the constant attack his city has endured since 2001.

People have 15 seconds to find covering between the time sirens sound and bombs drop.  To put things in perspective, he shared, “To those of you in the audience who have 3 or 4 children – think about what you would do in the 15 seconds.  You have to choose which child or maybe two you could save.  It’s not enough time to take care of them all.”  What would you do?

Promised Land teaches that shared passion fosters unbreakable bonds of love.  When our hearts are connected, the rest melts away.  I appreciated the contrast between the compassion, curiosity, and faith the surfers shared against a backdrop of violence and division.  It only takes a spark.  So much can happen when people are met at their point of passion.  Bravo to this crew for being and bringing the light.

I celebrate those who contribute to stories and efforts that become beacons of light in dark places – whether in Israel or right here on our own backyard.  I highly recommend seeing this movie if you have a chance.